Kingdoms
by Nivena
Summary: Samantha Winchester will do anything to save her brother. Even become the Queen of Hell. But the angels will stop at nothing to get their apocalypse, and not everyone is against the idea of raising Lucifer.
1. The Rise

_Written for the 2015 Sam Winchester Big Bang_

* * *

><p>Samantha Winchester had never liked labels. They said to her that you could only do one thing (girls are supposed to sing and dance not fight), that you could only be one thing (you can't be gay you like boys).<p>

Sometimes she envied her father and brother's black and white morality. Sometimes she was thankful she could see shades of grey.

Sometimes she just wished she didn't need to.

Hunting was a bleak, thankless, and miserable life (and all you'll have to show for in the end will be empty beer bottles and regret), and Sam wanted out. So she ran. She got herself into Stanford (see she could be competent after all) and she ran all the way to California. Right into the arms of a sweet blonde girl named Jess, who always smelled of old books and days at the library. Her sugar cookies were always just a little bit burnt, and she was always a little bit snappish when stressed, but she loved Sam and Sam loved her. They had an entire life planned out for themselves, and were planning on getting married as soon as it became legal (and when she found out it did three years after jess died she sits and laughs and cries and dean never knows what to say to her).

But then Dean came rolling back into her life and told her that Dad was gone and he was worried, and Sam couldn't say no to him. So she left Jess with a kiss and a promise to return before Monday (and she did jess just never made it) and climbed back into the car that had been her home for twenty years.

And then they went back to the pattern of hunting, like they've always done, and Sam could almost forget her freaky visions.

It's harder to forget them when they play out in front of her.

(just a little bit burnt huh)

* * *

><p><strong>February 7, 2006<strong>  
>Excerpt from Samantha Winchester's journal<br>Max Miller= telekinetic  
>his mom died just like mom and jess. related?<p>

Status- deceased (self-inflicted gunshot wound)

I may have telekinesis. Like the visions weren't bad enough.

* * *

><p>Sam hates her powers. Just another way to set her apart from everyone else, another reason she's a freak (baptized in hellfire and raised on salt and iron no wonder she's fucked up). They weren't even useful. All they ever showed her were people dying, and she never managed to stop it (useless sam you're useless). And then the telekinesis comes.<p>

At first it's small things. Her bed covers sometimes fall off even when she's across the room. Her hair dries faster than normal. Maybe when she reaches for things they're closer than before. She tries to ignore it for as long as she can (because she hasn't learned her lesson).

Then one day when she looks in the mirror, her eyes flash yellow. The mirror bursts into a million pieces the next second.

Sam can't ignore this any longer.

(she's never been this relieved that dean is out getting drunk)

* * *

><p><strong>October 26, 2006<strong>  
>So apparently not all the birth mothers died in the nursery. And apparently twins have the same psychic ability. Mind control. Sam wonders if the abilities are random or they have these specific abilities for a reason. Puzzling it out is frustrating and challenging. But that's okay.<p>

Sam's always liked a challenge.

* * *

><p>The telekinesis is like an entity of its own, only working with Sam when it wants to. It seems to react to Sam's anger by breaking things and throwing them around the room (which reminds her of john), but when she's happy, it fills her with this warm feeling (which is nothing like john). It takes months of practice, logged in whenever Dean goes out on a bender to drown his grief, but after a while, she gets it down. Using it is a bit like dancing with that entity inside her (it's a part of her but it doesn't feel like her), trying an intricate tango but only knowing half the steps.<p>

The visions are a whole different thing entirely. She can't do anything with them (except wake up sweating and screaming) and they still don't help her in any way.

* * *

><p><strong>April 13, 1998<strong>  
>Excerpt from John Winchester's journal<p>

Sam is fifteen years old, and already I can see something wrong with her. She shows no respect for the woman who gives her life, and she looks so much like my sweet Mary it hurts. I don't even think she's into men like normal women. I've never seen her look at them, and she might just be a lesbian. If she is, I'll have to beat it out of her.

* * *

><p>Sam hates reading her Dad's journal. She hates seeing all the accusations (he knew all along didn't he), and she hates the way he keeps comparing her to the woman she never even got to know. It reminds her of when her father would come home drunk and keep calling her Mary and asking her to forgive him (that's not happening in a long time).<p>

She closes the journal with an angry slam, and Dean looks up from his bed.

"Find anything?" he asks, genuine worry buried underneath a snarky smile and gruff, macho manliness.

She just throws the book at his bed and turns over. "I'm going to sleep."

(if she's mary's ghost then dean is john's)

* * *

><p><strong>December 9, 2006<strong>  
>Excerpt from Samantha Winchester's journal<p>

Croatoan virus= makes you a demon? zombie? not sure.  
>traces of sulfur in the blood<p>

Croatoan- name of a demon associated with plague and pestilence.

why am I immune? is it in common with the psychic kids?

why did it make me feel better? like... more complete? research more.

"Save Samantha or kill her."

Those were her father's last words.

You know what? Screw him.

(she's already damned herself anyways)

* * *

><p><strong>January 13, 2007<strong>  
>Excerpt from Samantha Winchester's journal<p>

Ava Wilson- psychic child- visions  
>demon(?) killed her fiance, nowhere to be found, presumed deceased.<p>

Scott Carey- psychic child- electrokinesis(?)  
>killed by Gordon Walker- somehow connected to yellow eyes<p>

Gordon Walker- hunter- STAY AWAY FROM HIM  
>fanatical, wants to kill me, probably wants revenge, imprisoned<p>

* * *

><p><strong>May 19, 2007<strong>  
>Excerpt from Samantha Winchester's journal<p>

Psychic Children  
>Rose Holt- nothing<br>prevented death and demonification (that is a word).

Andy Gallagher- mind control  
>deceased, killed by Ava, powers also grew enough to send images to other people<p>

Max Miller- telekinesis  
>deceased- self-inflicted gunshot wound.<p>

Ansem Weems- mind control  
>deceased, killed by Andy.<p>

Lily Baker- instant death touch  
>deceased, killed by I don't know and I don't want to know.<p>

Jake Talley- super strength  
>deceased, killed by me because he stabbed me and that hurt so yes I was a little angry.<p>

Ava Wilson- visions  
>confirmed deceased, killed by Jake Talley<p>

Me- visions and telekinesis  
>deceased at one point, killed by Jake Talley, brought back to life by Dean<p>

research ways to get Dean out of his deal, hellhounds, hell, etc.  
>the gates of hell have been opened as well, find out how to close it before everyone dies and shit.<p>

Azazel- demon- killed Mom and Jess  
>deceased, killed by Dean and Dad.<p>

October 4, 2007  
>Excerpt from Sam Winchester's journal<p>

To do: find out what Pride meant by Hellqueen. Also, research demon-killing knives. I want one.

* * *

><p>After Azazel died, Sam experienced the blessed relief of no more visions. However, her telekinesis seemed to withdraw, almost as if it is angry with her, and she finds it harder and harder to control it.<p>

But she has more important things to worry about.

Like what Pride meant by Hellqueen. Would it break Dean from his deal? Would it save him? Because with the way Dean's been acting, Sam feels like she'd kill him before his year is up in sheer frustrated anger.

(she shouldn't joke her telekinesis might take it seriously)

* * *

><p><strong>October 11, 2007<strong>  
>Excerpt from Samantha Winchester's journal<p>

Demon-killing woman is also a demon. And a hunter. May help with the hellqueen thing+breaking out of Dean's deal

Also, Dean has a son.

* * *

><p><strong>October 29, 2007<strong>  
>Excerpt from Bobby Singer's journal<p>

Colt is fixed. Demon helped.

Note to self: get Dean out of his deal.

* * *

><p>Excerpt from JohnDean Winchester's now shared journal

Sam killed the crossroads demon. She's trying to get me out of my deal, and she just doesn't understand- I need her to stay alive. I'm fine with dying. You know what I'm not fine with? Her powers getting out of control. She thinks I don't see the little bits of shattered glass, well, funny, you kind of notice it when you're suddenly missing a mirror. I don't have evidence of her actually doing anything, but I think it's getting worse. She never comes with me to bars anymore, and yeah, maybe getting hit on a lot is kind of annoying, but she can at least help earn some money.

God, I feel like a fucking girl right now.

* * *

><p>Ruby can't save Dean from hell. There goes plan B. But Sam's a stubborn little bastard (and rebellious to boot) and she's going to lay waste to Hell itself if it means getting Dean back. It should be easy. She already has a skeleton of a plan. Well, a skeleton with osteoporosis might be an exaggeration. But she remembers many things. She remembers exactly what made her such a good lawyer. She remembers the ease in which she found cracks in another person's armor. And most of all, she remembers a long time ago, one of the blurred out faces in her life once told her something she never forgot: "People are always going to say you can't do something. Being a girl doesn't make you weaker or less than the rest of them."<p>

When she shares that particular tidbit of information with Ruby, she laughs and confides that Hell always flourishes under a queen.

(after all the queen is the most powerful piece on the board)

* * *

><p><strong>January 32, 2008<strong>  
>Overheard by the clerk at the Conquistador Motel<p>

"Yes, the same thing will happen to you. It might take centuries, but sooner or later Hell will burn away your humanity. Every Hell-bound soul, every one, turns into something else. Turns you into us. So yeah. Yeah, you can count on it."

"There's no way of saving me from the Pit, is there?"

"Sorry. I can't."

"Then why'd you tell Sam you could?"

"Because Sam can."

* * *

><p>Sam is going to kill Bela when she finds her next. Seriously. The little bitch set them up, set the police on their trail. And as much as Sam loves her brother, she is not going to spend her time chained to him. Yeah, no. It's a good thing Hendrickson is too busy crowing over their defeat to notice Sam discreetly pulling one of the bobby pins in her hair out and putting it in her mouth. They were cheap and plastic so as not to set off metal detectors, but with the right training (like the kind you get from living life constantly on the move), you could use it to pick a lock.<p>

They get thrown into a cell together (and sam is definitely not going to forget that half-wit comment anytime soon) and as soon as they leave, Sam spits out the pin and palms it into her hand. Dean raises his eyebrows and smirks. "Nice idea, but they're gonna notice if we don't have cuffs on."

"We can make a run for it when they bring in the chopper."

That plan is scrapped when the demon comes in. The exorcise him, or attempt to, and he runs away.  
>Soon, they're facing an entire army of demons, with nothing but a rosary, a ton of salt, and a bucket of holy water. Sam pretends the water doesn't make her fingers sting when she touches it.<p>

Ruby shows up, drops the Lilith-bomb, and tries to sacrifice a virgin. Sam is all for it (better one life than all of them), but Dean's morals make a surprise guest appearance and he protests.

Sam ends up prerecording an exorcism (not a half-wit am i) and they blast it over the speakers as they open the doors and let the demons come in. The black souls swirl and then open a portal to hell as they all get thrown in it. Sam is horrified to find that a part of her wants to jump in as well (the same part that was fine with sacrificing the virgin).

In the end, Sam was right. It was either kill Nancy and Ruby, or everyone in that police station.

(and they chose everyone in the station)

* * *

><p><strong>May 8, 2008<strong>  
>Email sent to Samantha Winchester's account:<p>

Samantha,  
>If you're reading this, my soul was collected and your incompetent brother couldn't do anything about it. Slap him for me.<p>

Now, you're my favorite of the two, possibly because you're cute, possibly because you're tall, or possibly because you're actually intelligent. Or maybe all three. Whatever the reason, I'm contacting you. You're probably aware that I am currently in hell right now. It's probably hot, fiery, and reeking of sulfur. My hair is probably completely messed up. It most definitely sucks.

Come rescue me. Be my magical faerie princess or whatever. According to my sources, you're supposed to be? some demon queen ruler. Come, be mine. I'll give you a kiss.  
>Don't act so offended. I know you bat for the other team too. What, you think I was going to give you untested dream-root?<p>

-Yours truly  
>Bela<p>

* * *

><p>Sam's soul was impure. What else was new? The powers were getting stronger and stronger, and at one point, Sam actually uprooted a tree. That scared her. A lot. She had also snapped and told a couple street harassers to go fuck themselves. Which had happened to be possibly the worst way to find out you had mind control ever. It had gotten to the point where Sam was afraid to touch anyone, for fear of Lily's curse awakening inside of herself.<p>

She took to squatting, keeping herself from human society, running from town to town, and hiding in soft classical music and angry punk rock, all the types of music that Dean would have hated (but she can't listen to bon jovi ever again and she almost throws away dean's cassette tapes when she finds them).

She keeps going that way, until Ruby finds her.

And has sex with her and plots to kill the demon queen.

It's tempting, but revenge is not what Sam has in mind. She knows exactly how to bust Dean out of  
>hell, and if she gets to kill Lilith, then all the better.<p>

(there's a reason she wanted to be a lawyer)

* * *

><p><strong>July 9, 2008<strong>  
>Excerpt from the journal of Bobby Singer<p>

Demons are everywhere. They keep laughing and talking shit about Dean. Right before I send their asses to Hell. Some say things about Sam, too, how she's running from everyone. Wish the idiot girl would just talk to me, so I didn't have to find out what's happening to her because a demon says so. Girl ditched her phone, and took the Impala too. They call her 'one of them' and I really hope that doesn't mean what I think it means. Well, whatever it means, I hope she's okay, and she'll come see me soon.

* * *

><p><strong>July 13, 2008<strong>  
>Conversation between 'a tall, kinda buff girl' and a 'pretty brunette' witnessed in Bethany, Connecticut<p>

"You're not strong enough!"

"So what! Dean's been there for almost thirty years, someone needs to get him out!"

"You'll die if you do, and I won't come to get your sorry ass!"

"I don't need you."

* * *

><p>It isn't hard to find a crossroads demon. It is hard to get him to take her to hell, but the threat of non-existence helped make her point. As soon as he brought her into Hell, he turned tail and fled, and Sam was left alone with nothing but a demon-killing knife and a plan.<p>

Hell feels unsettling, but not in a way most people would think. A part of Sam feels comfortable there (a part that was thoroughly infected with demon blood), like it belongs, and the rest of her almost agrees. Her telekinesis seems to wrap around her, sort of like a cloak, ready to strike out if anything attacks her. Everything smells of burning flesh and sulfur, and screams pervade the air (and one of those raw voices belongs to dean).

Finally, she makes it to the throne room, a cavern made of blood and bone, in the center of which stands a throne made of skulls. The detached scientist in Samantha is interested, as none of the skulls looks human, but the obsessive (questionably) human part of her is more focused on the being inhabiting the throne.

Lilith's true form was terrifying. It looked vaguely human, but the flesh was falling off the frame and was only stitched together by bone-white threads of pure willpower. Her eyes emitted a dull glow as wings three times the size of her body stretched out over the throne room, a mockery of angel feathers, stained with blood and ash. Her hair was intricately braided, and on top of her rotting scalp lay a crown of thorns.

Sam's telekinesis seems to recoil from Lilith's presence as the queen slips off her throne, drawing nearer to her. She reaches up and places a hand on the huntress's cheek (out of place and cold in this world of fire) and smiles, tracing Sam's jaw.

"You're a quick learner," Lilith grins, then trails her fingers down Sam's throat and rests at her (corrupted) heart, slightly below Lilith's eye level. Suddenly Lilith's fingers crook and swipe downwards, the tip of her fingernail cutting through the fabric of Sam's jacket.

"A quick learner, but a bad, bad girl."

Nervously readjusting her grip on the knife, Sam tries to communicate with her telekinesis. It coils around her like a protective snake, hissing at Lilith, who simply smiles and tilts her head down, the glow in her eyes brightening.

"And bad girls need to be puuuunished!" She gleefully trills, then throws out her other hand, a glow around her intensifying until it was unbearable to look at. Sam shields her eyes, waiting until the glow subsides.

"Ooh. I see. You don't like submitting. That's why I fell, you know." Lilith grabs her by the jaw and pulls her down to her eye level. "I didn't want to submit to Adam. You know, us gals, oh, we make much better demons than men do! Adam, he was made to be obeyed, to be on top of the food chain. He wouldn't know the first thing about rebellion! But me, oh, I refused to submit. I didn't want him to dominate me. I rebelled. Just like Lucifer, oh he didn't want to follow rules either. None of us do."

(all fear the black queen)

Sam recoils from Lilith as soon as she lets go, and lashes out, managing to throw Lilith away and hold her down to the floor.

(with blood on her hands)

Ignoring the brain-melting headache, she focuses on Lilith, and felt a wave of satisfaction as Lilith's form began crumbling.  
>(in hellfire she stands)<p>

The demon queen's shrieks mingled with the sounds of agony outside and with a final burst of power, Lilith disintegrated.

(her voice soft and knife clean)

Sam fell to her knees, one hand braced against the floor and the other cradling her head.

(all fear the black queen)

* * *

><p>The denizens of Hell scurry away as Sam made her way through them, the crown placed on top of her blood-clumped hair. She plows her way through the torture racks, looking for her brother, her senses, demonic or otherwise, looking for the familiar presence that she identified as home (except that was all around her).<p>

She finds him holding a knife over a presumably male body stripped naked and stretched over a rack system. He's busy peeling the skin off of the particular male body when Sam puts her hand on him. Dean whips around with the knife and Sam quickly catches his wrist before he can hurt her.

"Dean!" She gasps out, feeling like she's about to cry or throw up. He rears back, and tries to punch her. It's only the leftover adrenaline from her fight with Lilith that lets her dodge that one. "Dean! It's me!"

They must have used her face to hurt him somehow here. Either that, or he actually doesn't recognize her. "Dean, remember, uh, remember that time in- god, where was it- Tennessee? Memphis? It was hot as hell and we wanted to cool off, remember? And you kept nagging me to come with you to the pool until I threw a book at you, right? And then you threatened to burn them all, so I came with you and then you tried doing the twenty-foot dive thing to impress the girl there, right? You had a bruise for a week, remember?"

Sam is distantly aware that she is crying, Dean's face so alien to her. She desperately tries to recall details of the event, to prove she was in fact his younger sister, and really should not have her face carved open.

Dean simply spits in her face. "Shut up, you yellow-eyed son of a bitch! I wasted you once, I can do it again."

She lets go in shock, and Dean jerks back. Quickly, Sam does the thing she promised herself she'd never do. She quickly places her hand on his forehead and whispers, "Go to sleep," and catches him as he falls.

She reemerges on the surface, near the motel she checked into. Nobody spares a second glance at the girl supporting her 'drunk' brother/boyfriend into the motel room. She lays him down on the other bed (so proud you already were assured you were going to win don't pride is a sin) and leaves to wash the scent of sulfur off her skin and forget that she has now assumed the title of queen of hell.

When she washes her face and looks in the mirror, she remembers again. Her eyes are a bright yellow-gold, almost the same shade as Azazel's. She closes her eyes to hide the unnatural shade from the world and winces when she hears her telekinesis shatter the mirror (and wasn't that how this all started with a shattered mirror).

When she turns around, a man in a trenchcoat is standing over her brother.


	2. The Reign

In the space of an hour, Sam learns that trenchcoat guy's name is Castiel, he's an angel, angels exist, killing Lilith did, in fact, make her the new queen, and that he was supposed to save Dean, not her. Oh, and that angels are apparently bastards, or at least this one (maybe he can see the taint in her).

It doesn't help when another one walks in, some smug dick in a suit. He gives a speech dripping with self-satisfaction, all "Dean is important to the angels" and "we'll take good care of him". Castiel cuts in with the cold, logical fact that Dean wouldn't be able to stand the sight of Sam's yellow eyes (see now they match her blood).

"I'll just wear contacts." She argues, carefully adjusting her hand so that the flat of the demon-killing knife hidden in her sleeve is flush against her wrist. Castiel notices and narrows his eyes. Sam decides to just forgo subtlety and lets it slide out of her sleeve, gripping it tightly.

Apparently Castiel has a stabby-thing of his own up his sleeve, something silvery and oddly triangular. Dick-face-in-a-suit (zachariah? maybe) puts a hand on the guy's shoulder, and shakes his head. "We're not taking no for an answer." (but neither is she.)

The lawyer in Sam decides to take over. "Technically, it's not my no to give. We have to wait for Dean to wake up and give consent." She consciously shifts from a fighting stance to one that makes her seem less dangerous (who is she kidding she's six foot four and covered in scars she'll always look dangerous), tucking the knife into the back of her pants. "You're angels. The good guys. You need to care about consent."

Zachariah seems to pick up on her naive religious faith, and plays on it. "Yeah, we're the good guys. So what do you say we wake Dean-o up and see what he thinks about all this?" He motions to Cas, who turns back to the forgotten bed and places his hand on Dean's forehead. Sam tries not to plunge her knife into the angel's back (or cut off his wings). Dean wakes with a gasp, bright green eyes snapping straight to Castiel's inhuman blue ones.

"You're not in Hell anymore, Dean." Cas intones. It doesn't stop Dean from hyperventilating and looking around wildly as if he expects an attack from all angles. His hands are clutching the sheets and almost tearing them in half from the grip he has on them. Sam averts her eyes, suddenly self-conscious of the bright yellow staining her irises.

"Sam?" Dean asks, voice hoarse and deep (from screaming for thirty years it's a wonder he has a voice at all). Sam raises her head (might as well get this over with) and looks at her brother, smiling bitterly.

"Hey Dean."

His voice hardens, and his eyes go cold. "Give me one good reason to believe you're my sister." (he's got you there)

"Ask the angels." She nods to Castiel and Zachariah.

Castiel looks at her brother and nods gravely. "She is indeed your sister, Dean. She sacrificed a part of her soul to become the queen of Hell."

Dean stares at Sam in horror. "'Why?" He asks, and Sam shakes her head. He stills hasn't commented on the 'angels are real' part, which tells her a lot about the shock he's in.

"Because I couldn't leave you in Hell."

Dean gets off the bed and grabs Sam by the collar, shoving her up against the wall. "You should have! Now... now you're some kind of half-demon freak! It wasn't worth it!"

"Yes it was." She snaps back and fuck she can feel the tears forming. "It was worth it." (she would throw her whole soul away for him)

Zachariah clear his throat and Dean let's go and whips his head around to stare at him. "So, angels, huh? They exist?" Cas does his impressive 'lightning-and-shadow-wings' thing to prove that he was, in fact, a winged little fuck-boy. Dean doesn't look impressed, but he was saved from commenting when

Dick-in-a-suit walked forward, a smarmy smile secured in place.

"Dean, we want your help. The demons, they're trying to crack open the seals, and free Lucifer. We need your help to stop them." He extends a hand and wow, Sam really hates him.

Dean stares at the hand like he has no idea what to do with it, and then raises an eyebrow. Sam crosses her arms defensively and wets her lips. "If demons are going to, in fact, try to free Satan, I can stop them."

"No you can't. Hell's best will be trying to get their god out of the cage we put him in, and you're just one person."

"I'm with the angels here, Sam." Dean says quietly, and Sam knows immediately she will never be able to bring him back to Hell without risking breaking him forever.

That makes something snap inside Sam. "As of now, I'm Hell's best. And I happen to be their queen. So shove it up your ass. I have a kingdom to rule, I just came for Dean." She spins around and walks out the door, feeling tears roll down her cheeks (she was never a pretty crier all snot and tears). She's just left her brother alone with two strangers (but at least they're pure unlike her) after he's survived Hell. Right after she killed the queen of Hell, became the new ruler of Hell, and pulled him out. But she can't drag him back into Hell, not after he just got out. Besides, he knew what she knew now, that she was a half-demon freak, not worth his love, something that belongs in the fire that he just escaped. Angels would be nice to him, they were meant to protect humans (but not abominations).

She moved down the street, careful to make sure nobody saw the color of her eyes, and fished her phone out of her pocket, dialing the number that had become so familiar over the course of three months.

"I won."

* * *

><p>Sam stabbed Ruby with her own knife. It was odd, and a rather morbidly funny parallel to how they had met, with Ruby shoving her knife in a demon and leaving a cryptic message behind. It had been obvious from the beginning that Ruby had an agenda of her own, and Sam wasn't willing to let that bite her in the ass. Sam burned the body out of respect to the brain-dead girl who had been hauled around by a demon for three months.<p>

The next thing Sam did was commit suicide.

Well, not exactly. Sam had wrested the title of Ruler of Hell from a demon, true, but only a small part of her soul had been turned into something non-human.

Which meant she couldn't just smoke out and fly off to Hell like a normal demon. No, she had to go the long way, a quick, neat line of blood over her wrist (and it's not like she hadn't wondered about it before). After all, all suicides went to Hell.

Dying was an odd sensation, a bit like falling into a pool. Everything became blurry, right before a vaguely Middle Eastern looking man in a suit and tie appeared in her field of vision. As soon as she met his eyes everything sharpened into focus again and she flinched.

"You're the new queen of Hell." He observed, looking her over, lingering on her odd eyes. Sam nodded, nervously placing Ruby's knife (still smeared with her blood) back into her belt loops. She had used it to slit her wrists (if only it had killed the demons inside her) and now she wanted to get it out of her sight

(suicide is baddirtywrong just like you).

"Could you please take me to Hell?" She asked, hoping the reaper wouldn't laugh in her face and leave her to be a vengeful ghost in the void forever. The reaper simply snorts.

"First time I've heard that one." He deadpans, then reaches for her hand. She gives it to him and the scenery flashes from a smelly motel room to the already familiar stone walls of Hell. The reaper leaves then, and Sam walks through the hallways calmly, like she knew the place since birth. She registers the fact that the thorny crown has made a reappearance on her head, and vaguely wonders if it is a sentient being. Most demons fled the hallways as they heard her coming, but one walks purposefully towards her. Or rather, crawls.

The demon's soulless black eyes seem to melt off her face, leaving drops of ink-black liquid wherever she moved, and its craggy purple skin folded into ragged bat wings. Its limbs are thin and seem to bend the wrong way and it's three claws are almost the size of Sam's whole hand. Sharp horns twist out of its skull, and some skin is missing in some places, revealing that the bones are, in fact, the same dirt brown color as the horns. Coming out of its spine is a twisted and ropy tail, twirling in the air like some creepy hairless version of a black cat.

It's lipless mouth curls up into what may have been intended to be a smile but got mangled somewhere in the delivery. It's teeth are just as rotten and brown as it's bones. "Heya, Sammy. Long time no see." It's voice is oddly childish, high-pitched and reedy, completely unlike Lilith's honey-sweet and dark murmur. Sam recognizes it at once.

"Meg." She identifies, feeling her mouth dry.

"Hey, hey, hey! Is that any way to talk to your sister?" She scolds, shaking her head. "Honestly, young ones these days."

"You are not my sister. No way." Sam hisses (but you can't deny the truth).

"Au contraire, dear sister. Old Man Yellow Eyes shared his blood with the both of us. He's your daddy just as much as he's mine."

"This is fucking bullshit."

Meg just laughs a terrifying keening laugh and follows along next to Sam. "So, where's that pretty little brother of yours? I'm hurt. He doesn't think I'm good enough for him?" She asks, body rising and dipping as her limbs bend in half and or straighten as she walks.

"Pretty sure that's incest." Sam responds, keeping her eyes fixed ahead of her and not on Meg's demonic version of Butoh.

"Pretty sure he's not related to me. Also pretty sure you're avoiding the question."

"Hell isn't exactly for everyone. It makes sense he doesn't want to be here."

Meg seems to consider that for a second, raising her hairless eyebrows in agreement. "What about your crusty-ass friend? Bobby?"

"He's terrified of demons. Didn't you see him when they exorcised you? And now his adopted daughter's queen bitch."

"Hm. Seems like my family's bigger than I thought. I got a foster dad now?" Meg nuzzles into her leg, and Sam tenses and tries not to scream.

"Yeah, well I'm the one with three dads here. And apparently eight siblings. Six of whom are dead. And one of whom stabbed me in the fucking back. Literally."

"Here in this family, we take sibling rivalry seriously." Meg jokes. Well, Sam thinks she was joking. Who knows?

Sam wets her lips and finally turned to face her demonic half-sister. "Why are you here?"

"Please. No questions about existentialism before I get my coffee." (of course she's joking just like dean)

"There's coffee in Hell?" Sam briefly wonders, then looks back at the grinning demon. "No, I mean why did you approach me? You know I hate you. I could have killed you, but you still walked up to me. Why?"

"Because I serve causes. And there 'aint no better cause than family, is there?" The words make Sam suddenly remember the brother she left behind, and she inhales quickly. "Basically, I'm your new second in command. No, you don't get a choice. Until someone kills me, I'm your second in command, your top general, and your annoying older half-sister. Deal."

It sounds so much like Dean that Sam has to smile. "Fair enough." She decides. "First order of business, then. Let's go find Bela Talbot."

(because Sam always follows through on her promises)

* * *

><p>Bela's form is the most humanoid demon form Sam has seen in all of Hell. Probably because she was only recently thrown into there, and held on for so long. Her eyes are the same soulless black as everyone elses though, and when she smiles as she sees Sam and Meg, her sharp and bloody teeth are on full display.<p>

"Ah. My knight in shining armor. You found me." She monotones, smirking, then holds out her hands, displaying blood encrusted shackles. (blood accumulated there because sam was too slow always too slow)

"I like her already." Meg grins, flicking her claws, melting the shackles right off Bela's hands. Bela rolls her wrists and smiles, running her hand over her face. Patches of skin are missing, and chunks of her hair have been pulled away, the rest of which was clumped up with blood.

"I was right. My hair is a complete mess." She sighed dramatically, attempting to comb it with her fingers and only succeeding at pulling out a sizable chunk of it. She makes a disgusted face and pulls it off her fingers, noting that her rotted skin came off with it. Electing to ignore the blood trickling down her forehead, she crosses her arms and looks at Sam. "So, not a chance of me getting out of here now that I'm a demon, is there?"

"Well, I can't really trust you to not go on a murdering spree upstairs."

"Basically, you're stuck with us and we can all knit each other sweaters and braid our hair." Meg rolls her eyes, causing them to make an odd squelching noise. Sam presses her fingers to the bridge of her nose to ward off the impending migraine that will probably happen with dealing with those two.

"No braiding hair. I do not look good bald." Bela warns, narrowing her eyes and wiping a trickle of blood away from her face.

"Okay you two, stop flirting for a second so we can go to the throne room where it doesn't smell constantly like sulfur."

"Awww... Is poor wittle Sammy feeling left out? It's okay, we always have room for more!" Meg grins mockingly, her already high voice going even higher.

"Is it some sort of requirement that everyone in Hell has to be gay?" Sam grumbles, turning away. Behind her, two voices ring out in unison, both surely sporting identical grins.

"Don't you know? Homosexuality is a sin!"

(guess she's gonna like it here)

* * *

><p>When Sam ducks into her private chambers for a brief moment of peace from the ticking time bomb of sexual tension that is Meg and Bela, she does not expect the fuck-boy angel to be there. Standing in the middle of the room. Waiting. It's actually kind of creepy, considering it seems incapable of blinking.<p>

"Do you... want something?" She asks, uncomfortable shifting in place. The angel's true form, probably usually blinding, has been dulled by Hell's power, however, the creature is still impressive and incredibly bright compared to the denizens of Hell. It is a massive, dense form of writhing white light, with piercing blue... Sam thinks they're eyes. She's not quite sure. The angel does have the enormous wings it displayed upstairs, but now visible in an odd color, a soft orange mixed with yellow. Castiel's true form reminds Sam of the sunsets she used to watch inside the Impala, beautiful, but in an abstract, ethereal manner.

A sharp, whining noise fills the room and Sam claps her hand over her ears to prevent them from leaking blood and brain matter or something. The angelic screeching, or whatever it was, stops, and instead, Sam hears the voice of Castiel's vessel speaking inside her head. Which is, okay, really weird.

"You said the demons would not break the seals. YOU LIED!" The last part is roared so loudly that Sam almost wishes it'd go back to the angelic screeching.

"None of my demons are allowed upstairs. I'd know if they were there." She argues back. "Now get out."

"The first thirty seals have already been broken and more are breaking as we speak. Your demons are outside of Hell, and they are breaking the locks on Lucifer's cage."

Okay. Now Sam's pissed. "No, that's not happening. 'Cause guess what? I can feel every single one of them, each and every one. And demons feel different on the surface. Their emotions go wild up there. I would feel that happening. And guess what. It's not! Because I ordered them all back in Hell, and if one of them goes to the surface, I kill them. So someone else is breaking those seals, but don't you dare blame me for it. I have nothing to do with this, I want nothing to do with this, and releasing Lucifer would, in no way, be beneficial to me. I want to keep my throne, and releasing the demon god? Ha, Satan will tear me apart faster than you can say 'fucking hell'! We're, as much as I hate to admit it, on the same side here, Castiel." She vaguely registers that she possibly has pissed off a being more than capable of removing her very existence from the face of the Earth, but honestly, Sam's tired and emotionally strung out. Abandoning your brother to rule over creatures who's very nature is to be rebellious and power-hungry tends to do that to you.

Castiel is quiet for a minute before answering again. "You make good points. We are on the same side here. I am sorry." Sam is momentarily struck dumb by the fact that an angel, a pure and holy being apologized to her, a little demon freak, that she almost doesn't hear the rest of its spiel. "But this does mean someone else is breaking the seals. We can only defend so many seals at once, at we cannot get there fast enough."

Sam snorts. "Well, I can't trust demons to guard seals, so, looks like you're on your own, choir-boy. Now please leave before someone discovers you here. I don't want to explain to someone why I have an angel in my room."

"That is a good idea." Castiel concedes.

"Wait! Before you go... is Dean okay?" Sam has to ask, before she dies of worry. Castiel seems to deliberate on it for a bit and Sam adds "The truth, please."

"He thinks you are a demonic freak, and that you are nothing better than the things that they hunt. I must to agree with him there." Okay, now Sam wants to stab Angel-Face. But it does sound like something Dean would say.

"Thank you." She nods, turning away as a dismissal. There is a rustle of feathers, and Castiel is gone. All Sam can think is that at least Dean is angry, not sad.

* * *

><p>Ruling Hell is hard to get the hang of for the first few years. The first thing she does is personally execute every demon involved with Dean's suffering. She wouldn't admit it, even under his torture, but she got a twisted satisfaction out of ripping out Alistair's heart. However, that means that Sam is forced to appoint a chief torturer. She chooses Meg, and hopes her sadistic grin doesn't indicate she chose wrong. Hell is surprisingly political, a smoothly running system. Then Sam came in and fucked everything up. Before, demons could be let loose to wreak destruction and terror upon the Earth at random. Of course, as soon as Sam figured out how to close and open the gates of Hell, only a few demons are allowed on the surface, those who had proven loyalty to her. Meg and Bela had proved a good distraction from the raw wound in her heart that came with Dean's rejection. It had almost settled into some semblance of normality.<p>

Then the blue guy accidentally walked into Hell. At least, he insists it was an accident. With him, it's kind of hard to tell.

It startles everyone, especially Sam, who's only visitor these past... 50, maybe 60 years had been the Magical Fuck Boy. And only then it was just once a decade check ins.

Being the good and benevolent queen she is, Sam walks forward to meet with the blue guy. Whom she thinks is eating a stick of pure butter.

Incredible. And really gross.

"Dude, who're you and what're you doing here?" Sam employs her standard method of engaging unknown, possibly mythical, entities. Ask them what they are and either kill them or make them go away.

"Oh! Hey! Do you know where I am?" The... okay at this point Sam is just assuming he's a mythical entity because absolutely nothing else would wear a shit eating grin like that when surrounded by creatures that came straight out of Nightvale.

"You're... in Hell."

"Oh! Cool! What's that?"

Jesus fucking Christ, Sam would take the socially stunted magical fuck boy over this any day. At least he doesn't keep smiling.

"It's... the place where bad people go when they die. And then they get tortured for all eternity and all that shit." It's like talking to a six year old.

"That's stupid. Our system works better. Less… sticky bloody torture racks. And twenty years of living as a turtle is surprisingly calming. I should know."

Ah. Bingo. "Krishna." Sam mutters. "You're Sri Krishna."

"Yup!" Blue guys grins even wider, if that was possible, and how did Sam not see this before- it's not like being blue is a sexy fashion trend or anything. "Now, uh, if you could please direct me to the Himalayas, I'd be very happy."

"Oh yeah, just, uh," Sam gestures awkwardly over her shoulder at the hallway behind her. "Take a left at the first fork, then the third door on the right. Usually pops you straight into South India. City changes every hour. Just, uh, walk into the swirly black and purple thingy. Ignore the lightning, it's just there for dramatic effect or something. And.. uh.. yeah. Hitchhike or something." She hopes that Sri Krishna can teleport or something, because, well, he's blue. She's not discriminatory or anything, but… blue.

Sam thinks nothing of the event until a few years later, when a woman in a kimono walks through the racks emitting light and screaming Japanese at people. Funnily enough, if there is a demon in Hell who speaks Japanese, they don't step forward.

"Nihongo o hanashimasu ka?" The woman gets up into Sam's face, muttering things Sam vaguely recognizes as curses. Like, normal 'fuck you you shit fuckery crap face' curses, not the 'may your toes and nose fall of if you open this sarcophagus' curses.

Sam walks forward, attempting to draw on her past, rather embarrassing, dive into Japanese culture. "Hai... wa...ka...ranai?" This prompts an excited stream of words from the surprisingly pretty glowing woman.

"Watashi no hobakurafu-futo wa u...nagi? De ippai desu?" Sam stutters out, recalling that phrase from one of her textbooks, and hoping it meant 'I don't fucking speak Japanese'.

Pretty Glowy Girl bursts out laughing, which wasn't really what Sam was going for.

She tries again. 'Nihongo... no?" That works.

Pretty Glowy Girl stops laughing and says, in perfect English, "Oh. Why didn't you say so?"

Sam feels like screaming.

"Okay. Who are you, why are you here, and please leave."

"My name is Amaterasu-O-Mi-Kami. I am the sun god of the Shinto, and also the god of the universe.

My brethren are-" She spits out, textbook style.

"Yeah, that's great. What are you doing in Hell and what will it take to get you to leave?"

Amaterasu-O-Mi-Kami looks offended at being cut off mid-syllable, and is about to voice her complaint when Sam grabs her by the arm and forcibly shoves her topside, into some kind of forest or something.

Apparently magical fuck boy angel was waiting for them upstairs because he appears right away, fluttering into existence right behind her.

"Okay, what is going on?" Sam asks, letting go of the Shinto goddess to address the angel.

Wow, her life is weird.

"The angels have Dean." Castiel pronounces in a dramatic manner.

"Yes. I am aware of that. I left him with you." She rubs her eyes, suddenly self-conscious of her yellow eyes.

"No, no, there's more! Amaterasu-O-Mi-Kami was brought here because of the angels. They want the apocalypse." The angel looks about to panic, looking more like a lost puppy than a warrior of god. Sam automatically feels the need to comfort him.

"Okay, okay. Start at the beginning. Calmly." She says quickly, carefully placing her hands on his shoulders in an attempt to soothe him.

Castiel takes a deep breath and mentally grounds himself. "The angels want Lucifer free as much as the demons do- wanted to." He amends at Sam's dirty look. "But the last seal was killing Lilith, and you've already erased her from existence. So now they're attempting to break down the walls between the dimensions to find someone to take Lilith's place as the last seal."

"Different dimen- wait, is that why people keep appearing in Hell?" The dots connect in Sam's head, and then she narrows her eyes. "What exactly is the last seal?"

"Lucifer's true vessel must kill the first ruler of the damned." Cas rattles off immediately, and Sam only registers the first part after a bit.

"Wait, Lucifer's true vessel?" Sam asks in a way that was most definitely not shrieking, thank you very much.

"Yes. And Dean is Michael's true vessel. You two are destined to be the hosts of the apocalypse."

"We need to find Dean." Sam decides immediately. Amaterasu looks angry.

"Lucifer will not be allowed to rise. This is our world as well." She hisses, looking a lot less pretty and a lot more terrifying. She dissipates in a burst of light so brilliant it almost blinds the other two. Cas looks on the edge of a full blown panic attack, and Sam takes pity on it/him/what-the-fuck-ever.

"Okay, breathe. In for four seconds, hold for seven, out for eight." She parrots lines she heard somewhere someonce (it's hard to sort out all of the blurry faces). Cas waves her off, then stands up to reestablish control.

"We must find your brother." He announces, and Sam feels a pang of loss for the brother she lost whom she was just learning to let go of. So much for the angels protecting him.

"I can't just leave Hell alone. There would be anarchy!" She snaps. "They're demons, in case you forgot."

Castiel looks at her, curling his lip. "Trust me, I did not."

Okay, fuck him.

"Just leave your generals in charge. Someone who is loyal." Fuck-boy says, like it's easy to find a loyal demon, and then adjusts his trench coat and walks off, leaving Sam to mutter angrily behind him.

"Oh, a loyal demon. Yeah, that's easy to find. Not like it's an oxymoron or anything." She's aware she's being a bit petty. She's allowed to be. Her brother has just been abducted by the creatures she's looked up at all her life and she's Satan's fucking vessel holy shit don't freak out.

The worst part is she's not even fazed by most of it. Almost a hundred years of ruling Hell and quashing rebellions has kind of desensitized her of most weirdness. But... Satan's vessel (you always were dirty makes sense you and lucifer are tied to each other). Her telekinesis, having long grafted itself to her soul, chose that moment to lash out again, making trees crash around her. Sam takes a deep breath (in for four hold seven out for eight) and walks back into Hell.

* * *

><p>It's probably a really bad idea to leave Meg and Bela in charge. Sam doesn't have a choice if she wants to find her brother. She pinpoints Castiel's specific grace trail, something soft orange like his wings, and smells like the dirt after a long storm and follows it to some place in Iowa, maybe. She feels a slight pop as she materializes into existence right where Castiel's grace trail ends. However, it seems she miscalculated the distance between them, and crashes right into him.<p>

"Sorry." She mumbles, getting to her feet quickly and offering a hand to Castiel. He stares at it.

"What are you trying to do?"

"Uhhh," Sam slowly retracts her hand. "Help you up."

"Oh." Castiel says as he stands up, brushing himself off. "That is an odd custom. I am perfectly capable of getting up by myself."

"It's... it's just a human custom. Because, you know, I'm the one who crashed into you, so I should help you get up, and.." Sam trails off.

"So it was an act of redemption."

"What? No! No, it's just... politeness."

"You committed an act of violence against me accidentally and then offered your help to redeem yourself." Okay, Castiel's logic wasn't flawed, but it just emphasized the differences between him and her.

Demons don't believe in redemption.

(and she is one of them now)

* * *

><p>When they walk into some abandoned building or the other, Sam is greeted with the sight of several deities. Her training kicks in as she automatically identifies each god -Apollo, Hades, Odin, Vayu, Lada, Hestia, Ipabog, Oya- and those are only the ones she can identify on sight. The entire warehouse is alive with power, each a different color to her demonic eyes, auras of wispy blues and poisonous greens, interrupted by the occasional blood red or orange. Feathers and heads of snakes and animals Sam didn't even know existed twine together, around their gods, hisses and shrieks making a cacophonous soundtrack to the scene in front of her. Painted skin and smooth rock-like exoskeletons and smudged features and wicked talons and inhuman features and oh god Sam needs to get away there'ssomanypeople.<p>

Running away is out of the question, because as soon as they enter the room, every single eye in the room falls on her.

Fuck it. She's the queen of hell. She can bullshit some confidence.

"Castiel. The fuck is going on?" She asked, in what she hoped was a whisper. Instead, every single head, and several other head-like appendages swiveled towards her.

Well, it could have been worse. They could have done it simultaneously.

"Who is this child?" A woman(?), maybe Oya, hissed out, stepping forward. Her own aura of power was silver, wild and fierce, and Sam was afraid of stepping too close, for fear of incineration. The woman(?)'s eyes flashed, millenia-old power welling inside her.

"She is of our Christian brethren." The sun-bronzed man with symbols covering his naked chest, whom Sam assumed to be Apollo, sneers. "One of the pathetic ones. The daemons."

"Demons." Castiel corrects.

"Shut it, angel." Oya barks, still fixing her completely ice-blue eyes on her. Against the impossibly dark skin, her eyes seem even more ancient and unnatural than before.

"No. Not just a demon. The face of Lucifer." The woman with the blood red aura speaks, and wow is that a necklace of skulls? "A woman of the underworld? I can relate."

She smiles slowly, and Sam decides that she is definitely not someone to cross. Especially with a necklace of human skulls, and where has she heard that be-

"Kali." Sam identifies, clenching and opening her fists in nervousness. Because holy shit Hindu goddess of empowerment and scary things.

"Mm. Seems like not all you Westerners are as ignorant about us ancients."

"That is enough, Kali." Castiel thunders, possibly noticing how scared Sam is, or, more likely, just annoyed that the discussion is becoming off topic.

"Who's to say you run this show, angel?" She snaps, the words shuddering through the air like knives. Sam never realized it was possible to use the word 'angel' as an insult until now.

"You are in the world of the Christians now. We are attempting to restore you to your own worlds, where you are the supreme religion. For now, please cooperate with us."

"Okay, will someone please tell me what's going on? I just want my brother back." Sam yells out, cringing a little and the quiet, and then tittering.

"Mmm. Puppy girl's got a backbone!" Someone yelled out loudly.

"I believe my brothers and sisters in heaven destroyed the barriers between dimension in an attempt to raise Lucifer. As Lilith is incapable of serving as the last seal, they will select another god of the underworld to act in their place. We must stop this from happening." Castiel explains, as Sam tries and utterly fails to connect that explanation to her brother.

"Yeah? And? I know this already." She prompts.

"You are Lucifer's vessel. Dean is Michael's. The angels and demons loyal to Lucifer need you both to consent to proceed with the apocalypse. They are attempting to get Dean's consent right now. However, if we can keep the final seal and Lucifer's vessel from the angels, we have a greater chance of stopping them."

Oh.

Kali breaks out into laughter. "Honey, nobody told you?" Sam feels a bit of a flush in her cheeks.

"They told me about the Lucifer thing. Not that Dean was mixed up in this." Dean was supposed to be the normal one. The one who only had to worry about normal monsters (it was fucked up that she thought of certain monsters as 'no

rmal' but whatever) and the one who should never have been tainted by Hell. The... the pure one (light so bright it was blinding compared to her).

"Aw. That's so like angels. Keeping things from everyone, even each other." Apollo grins, and Castiel seems to take offense to that.

"We do not act that way. We are brethren."

"You guys are kind of like the weirdest, most fucked up family ever, with an absentee father to boot." Sam mused, unaware she was doing so out loud. She starts when she hears a sharp laugh.

"I feel like you and I are going to be good friends." Kali grins.

* * *

><p>It takes a lot to get the gods united on this cause. It turns out, the one thing stronger than their mutual hatred was their hatred for the 'asshole westerner Christians'.<p>

Sam was slightly afraid that several of them were going to pluck her yellow eyes out and kill her (and it wouldn't be such a bad loss would it) and to a lesser extent, so was Castiel.

They sit around a table together, fourteen inhuman beings plotting to stop angels from causing hell on earth. Power sparks and crackles in the air as each being speaks, eyes flashing and auras spiking as the human masks slip every once in a while. Snakes and spiders and creatures of the night gather as near to them as they dare, as deer and fawn and innocent creatures of the like run as far away as they can.

Fourteen inhuman beings plot to stop the angels from causing hell on earth.

Far away, hell on earth has just begun.


	3. The Ruin

Oya is the one who notices first. She doesn't say anything right away, planning on keeping it a secret, a card to be played just right. But Oya is the protectress of women, and she will not betray her own, even when they are weak. She still lingers sometimes, watching as the demihuman hides in the corners of their abandoned warehouse-turned-base. She notices the subtle shake of her hands, the way the Hellqueen never seems to sit still enough. The child was poisoned as a baby, fire flowing through her veins, and while Hell may have dulled the addiction the puppetmaster awoke, being away from her home for so long had brought back the need with a vengeance. None of the creatures in the base have what they need, however, the blood of the damned. And Oya may be fierce, may be too stubborn and too full of rage, and she may be many things, but cruel has never been one of them.

One day she vanishes, reappearing in a car being driven by demons out for a joyride in tall, broad bikers. She leaves behind scarps of metal that used to be motorcycles and bodies with torn out throats, but not a single drop of blood was wasted. She reappears in their base, announcing her presence with the pop snap crackle of fire, and hefts her jug of blood. She finds the child hiding behind a wall of cardboard boxes, running her fingers through her blood-matted hair and curling up as tight as her long body would allow. Power rests about her in a cloak, slightly disconnected from her soul, but still obviously her's, harnessed and tamed. It writhes around her, silver and red and black and never quite choosing what color it wants to be. The goddess feels like kicking her and telling her to get up, but instead, she drops to the filthy ground beside her and sets the jug in front of the desperate addict.

"What are you doing?" Sam croaks out, looking up to meet Oya's eyes. Her own eyes keep shifting from yellow to hazel-green, not quite deciding whether to reject the demon in her or the human.

"I am offering my services."

"I don't need your help."

Another proud soul. Oya can relate. She feels like flaying the woman from the inside out for daring to refuse her help. Instead, she settles down next to the distrustful demihuman and shakes her head.

"I am the spirit of change. Transition. Chaos. Destrustion. I bring the living to the underworld. The beloved dead, they are my children. You, you rule over the unwanted ones. The sinners, the damned. We may find each other's stories interesting."

Sam is quiet for a long time. Then she speaks, voice hoarse and disused.

"Not all of the damned were sinners."

"Elaborate."

"I-I had an adviser whom I knew in life. Bela Talbot, her name was. She sold her soul so a demon would kill her parents, and then take her to hell in ten years. She was fourteen."

"I knew a woman, a prostitute. She fainted from relief when she found me when she died because she thought she was too dirty to be pure."

Sam keeps her eyes studiously fixed on a point in the ground not being occupied by the damning jug.

"Did you kill them?" She finally asks.

"The demons?"

"The humans they were riding."

"I didn't check."

Sam nods her head. Oya leaves, and when she comes back, the jug is empty and Sam is gone.

Not a single drop of blood was wasted.

* * *

><p>Sam knew she shouldn't have left Hell in the hands of her demonic advisers. What had she told Castiel? There is no such thing as a loyal demon. No such thing. The Yoruba goddess had given her enough demon blood to restore her powers to the full hell-ruling capacity, but she was going to crash soon. She needed to get this over with, fast.<p>

She did it just outside the warehouse base. A quick slash of the wrists was all she needed (right over the previous scars or are they guidelines?), since a gunshot would attract too much attention and she had a knife on her anyways. She watches the blood pour down her arms with a sense of disconnected impatience, as if she was just waiting for the microwave to heat up day old coffee, not watching her life trickle away. She feels herself getting dizzier, feeling the thirstiness characteristic of blood loss, and the odd flip-flop feeling of anxiety that never goes away, no matter how many times she does this.

Finally, the world goes black around the edges and her reaper arrives. He takes one look at his only returning customer and snaps his fingers, not even bothering to talk. Sam feels herself come to in Hell, the familiar feel of sulfur and uncomfortably sweaty heat soothing her, calming her jitters.

She walks down the ancient stone corridor, muscle memory directing her to the throne room as her mind wandered, and her thoughts kept circling back to 'how could they do this' and 'i trusted them' and 'i was stupid to trust them'.

(everyone has a hidden agenda after all she did)

The scar on her back itches, right where Jake Talley stabbed her. It always does whenever she starts entertaining idealistic notions like loyalty and trust. She did once, killed for it. She remembers what she's been told all her life, "Don't trust." Men will rape you if you trust them enough to wear a short skirt or a tight shirt. Monsters will kill you if you trust them enough to let them go. People will stab you in the back if you trust them enough to let them close.

So much for familial loyalty (and she isn't sure if she's thinking of dean or meg or john with that sentence). John's last words were her execution order. Dean left her for the (not so) pure angels. And Meg is letting demons out of Hell. She probably took over in the absence of Sam's reign.

Sam remembers the books she read as a young child, devouring the words like if she put them down she'd never see them again. She always recalled specific phrases that seemed to copy from book to book, from person to person, specific thoughts that became everyday language. "His eyes popped out of his head" (except sam's already seen that and it's as disgusting as you'd think), "Did I say that out loud?" (you have to keep a tight lid on your mouth if you want to survive in john winchester's army), "She drank like a fish" (except it wouldn't be she because young ladies aren't supposed to drink).

Sam has also read the words "They were so deep in thought they didn't realize they were at their destination," several times. However, she does not understand the meaning of those words. If you wanted to survive in the life, you always needed to know exactly where you are no matter how interesting your thoughts are.

Which is why, when Sam walks up to the massive doors to the throne room, she knows exactly where she is, circular thoughts be damned. She knows exactly what she's doing when she throws the doors wide open, the doors she had always suspected were a sentient entity, and had frequently attempted to catch staring at her.

She knows exactly what she's going to see, too. Right there on the throne is Meg's twisted and deformed form, Bela's cruel mockery of humanity right next to her.

"Sam. We were waiting for you." Bela smiles, and Sam notices new gashes in the sides of her mouth. The ink black eyes only reflected Sam's own sick yellow irises back at her, which made Sam clench her fists.

She was going to kill them.

"I knew you'd notice the demons I sent upstairs." Meg smiled, getting off the throne. "See, I have an offer for you."

"I'm listening." Sam gritted out, the remaining pieces of her telekinesis that hadn't been grafted onto her soul trying to lash out.

"I have Dean's location. Give me the throne, and I'll tell you." The sinister tone was completely at odds with Meg's sharp, childlike voice.

Without hesitating, Sam reached up and pulled the thorn crown free of her tangled hair, careful not to prick her fingers. Meg smiled, showing all her dagger-like teeth.

"I thought you wanted Lucifer free." Sam asks, wary of the inevitable ulterior motive.

"Don't ask about my motives." Meg hisses, motioning for the crown. Sam notices Bela tense, like she's about to stab Sam right in the throat and pull her intestines out, and Sam realizes what's going on immediately.

Demons don't have their emotions stripped away. Instead, they're amplified, hate and rage breaking through until they become beings made completely of malevolence. There isn't much risk of love pulling through (nobody could love such a black impure evil creature), but sometimes, very rarely, it happens. Meg knows exactly what her father would do to a low-level demon such as Bela. And she wouldn't risk it happening. Demons look out for themselves and their own first and foremost.

"Dean's location first." Sam insists. After all, she's the one holding the power in the room.

"He's in St. Mary's Convent, Ilchester, Maryland."

Sam blinks at how casually Meg tossed it out. She had expected a bit more of power struggle, a fight over who would concede still doesn't quite believe Meg (and she'd be a fool if she did). But she has nothing else to go on (besides she knows not to question where megs information comes from), and it's not like she wanted the crown, anyways. Meg may not be a good person, but she would rather have Meg and Bela ruling over the damned rather than someone like Alistair. There's always the hope that the cracked glass and steel of Bela's (still too human) soul would keep Meg's cold fire in place. She places the crown on Meg's head, nods to Bela, and walks out, appearing right outside a place of worship that has her skin tingling, the smell of Hell vanishing right off of Sam's skin as she walks on the consecrated grounds.

A man, white, probably European, spreads his hands wide out, smiling at Sam with a grin reminiscent of sharks. He short, shorter than Sam, although, almost everyone is. There is no sign of the brother she is looking for. "Well, hello there, Hellqueen! Such a pleasure to meet you." The man smirks, his voice is dripping with oil, and Sam is suddenly reminded of the men in dives who hit on her. The ones who won't take no for an answer- that is, until she breaks their fingers. They have the same air of entitlement and persistence about them.

"Who are you?" She asks, sucking a breath in.

"Not imp-"

"He's known as Hades to most." A woman's voice fills the room, melodic and soft, with an undercurrent of pure steel running through it.

"Hel." Hades greets casually, and wow, how had Sam not noticed the thick aura of power in the room. Now that she was genuinely looking, she could make out a dull grey aura around Hades, and and something midnight blue radiating from the corner, swirling around the room. It shrouded a feminine-looking figure, so Sam decided to just flip off her aura-vision, and look at the human figure.

Hel steps out of the shadows, and Sam remembers reading a book on Norse mythology. It said that Hel was half black, and half flesh-colored. It was right. However, the book failed to mention that one side of her body had all the bones exposed, and on some parts, skin stretches in vain to cover it. Her eyes seem to take turns flashing between black-blue and fiery red, swirling endlessly around and around, never seeming to decide on one color or the other. Sometimes, it seems like there are eyes all the way down her arms, and in other moments, it seems like that half of her is completely unremarkable.

"What do you think you're doing?" Hel asks, making the question sound completely innocent. Sam can see Hel gathering up her aura however, tendrils of blue sharpening into piercing lances, waiting for her go ahead to spear the god of the underworld in front of her.

"My brethren abandoned me!" He shrieks, and yeah, he definitely reminds her of the pissbabies she tends to deal with. Always whining and screeching.

Hel seems to share her annoyance."Do not throw a tantrum like an insolent child. You are an ancient god of the earth. Act like one. Exactly what are you doing, attempting to pull out Yahweh's rebellious angel?" She snaps, eyes flashing bright red and aura bristling.

Hades seems to realize what a shitload of trouble he's in, but instead of backtracking and apologizing, like an sane person would do in the face of Hel's fury, he tries to justify himself.

"Don't you want to see your family suffer? We were locked away, forced to rule over the dead while the others took realms of sun and sky!"

"And you want to die, just so you can have one final 'fuck you' to your family? That's another level of selfish, even for you, Hades. You realize that we are in the realm of the Christians, now? They have absolute power here. We are nowhere near a fraction of our strength. They would slaughter all of us, not just the family you want revenge on!" Hel's eyes flash pure white as all of her power directs at the Greek God. "I can't let you do that."

Hel draws out the fight, spearing apart Hades and batting away his futile attempts at resistance. Finally, she punches a hole straight through his chest, then leaves him to bleed out on the ground. Then she turns her eyes on Sam, her eyes fading back to their original blue-red.

"Do you know where my brother is?"

Hel's expression is… well not sad, but maybe sympathetic. "I took him away. He's safe now."

"What did-"

"You want to redeem yourself, right?" Hel cuts her off, lifting Sam's chin with her skeletal fingers, and that is the first time Sam notices that Hel is about seven feet tall.

"Yes." Sam chokes out because redemption is all she's ever wanted, a chance to set things right, but it's not what she's going to get (but maybe she will).

Hel taps her other fingers to Sam's forehead, and Sam is suddenly full to the brim with two sets of memories, her own, and ones of Dean, living a full life as an only child to Mr. and Mrs. Smith, people Sam has never seen before, but automatically knows, and as she sees him growing up, while she recognizes nothing about it, she knows exactly what is going on. Dean is living a life away from hunting, getting a degree, leaving home, and all the details are different but it is still her brother, the person she knows so well, grew up with, and she can't takeitanymoreshehasto-

Hel removes her fingers, and Sam can't breath anymore, but still manages to gasp out a question. "What was-"

"Restoring the borders between the worlds will take a lot of energy. There is not much that can create that much power." Hel states in cool, clipped tones. "Human souls, however, can. If you give up your soul to me, I can craft it into barriers between each of our separate worlds. I already know where the breach is. Hades let the angels into the world the Greeks rule over, and brought down the rest of the walls with it."

"Well, what's to stop the angels from getting consent from another god and breaking the walls again? If the walls are all connected-"

"You underestimate the power inside you. I can plug the breach up and create separate walls between all the dimensions. Besides, you will cease to exist, and therefore, there will be no vessel for the angels to put Lucifer in. That is why I have used most of my power to give your brother another life. He knows nothing of you. He will live a happy, full life."

Sam nods. "Thank you."

"Do not thank me. I am about to kill you." Hel's face takes on a softer, more sympathetic, expression. She lowers down and kisses Sam's forehead, and then reaches inside of Sam's chest.

Blinding, white-hot pain fills her vision. The demonic part of her soul, corrupted with blood, fizzles out of existence as Hel stretches her soul thin, and Sam sees glimpses of other worlds. Futuristic spires and houses engineered to wash away with the monsoons and metropolises built into forests rather than over, and dwellings under water and she sees as all the gods vanish and reappear into their own worlds and that is all she sees before her mind goes so thin it snaps, and Sam's final thought before that happens is "everyone is okay". Unbeknownst to her, that final thought echoes through the worlds, carrying the words in an unusually strong gust of wind.

Hel is the last to go back home, laying down the spent body carefully, and then walking back to her family and her subjects through the last hole in the walls there will ever be.

* * *

><p>In a small church in Illchester, Maryland, a body awakes. It is a young woman with scars she always covers up, and a height she always plays down. She has eyes that never seems to decide on what color they should be (eyes are the window to the soul aren't they) and a smile that always looks forced.<p>

She carefully gets up, and starts an assessment of what is missing.

Her limbs are intact.

All of her senses are functional.

She is not noticeably disfigured.

She remembers everything.

She is missing a soul.

Her name is Samantha Winchester. She is a hunter. And she has work to do.


End file.
